


i want to rest in your light

by starlight_sugar



Category: Rooster Teeth/Achievement Hunter/Funhaus RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe - Roommates/Housemates, Multi, background Bruce/Joel
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-21
Updated: 2016-03-21
Packaged: 2018-05-28 02:21:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 11,018
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6311296
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/starlight_sugar/pseuds/starlight_sugar
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Adam is hugely, embarrassingly, deeply in love with James and Elyse. He also has to stay with them for the weekend and act normal. Nothing could possibly go wrong.</p>
            </blockquote>





	i want to rest in your light

**Author's Note:**

> Rooster Teeth does not have my permission to use any portion of my writing in their content.

It starts with a cockroach. Or, more accurately, it starts when Adam gets home from work on Monday and there’s a dead cockroach outside his apartment door.

“Huh,” he says, mostly because there’s nothing else he can say to the sinking feeling in his stomach. There’s no way that there’s only one cockroach in the building, not when he lives on the third floor. This looks like the beginning of a roach problem, and if there’s a roach problem, then he’s going to have a problem.

But really, there’s nothing to do about one dead cockroach. He takes a picture of it and sends it to Bruce (captioned “look I got a roommate”), adds roach spray to his shopping list, and then he puts it out of his mind. There’s no reason whatsoever that one cockroach means there’s an infestation. One single roach made it to the third floor of his building. That doesn’t mean anything.

.

Adam isn’t surprised to find the fumigation notice in the email the next day. Fucking roaches.

The first thing he does is call Bruce, who says, “Oh, shit, that was a real cockroach?”

Adam frowns. “Why would I send you a picture of a fake cockroach?”

“Some kind of weird mind game. You play mind games, Kovic.”

“That’s not even - what mind games do I play?”

“I don’t know,” Bruce admits. “That sucks about the fumigation.”

“Yeah,” Adam says. His building isn’t great - it’s actually kind of shitty - but normally it’s at least livable. “Is there any way I can crash with you guys Friday night?”

Bruce hisses through his teeth, and Adam feels the floor drop out from under his feet. “I’d offer you our couch, but Joel’s sister is in town this weekend, so she has dibs. We can dig up the air mattress if you want.”

“No, it’s fine,” Adam sighs, already flipping through his mental rolodex of motels. He’s glad to have an apartment, but it’s a piece of shit apartment, and this has happened before. If Bruce and Joel already have someone over, he won’t impose himself. “I can find a motel for the night, it’s no big deal.”

Bruce snorts. “Okay, no, you’re not staying in a motel.”

“Why not?”

“For one thing, because motels are shitty, and for another thing, because you have a cat.”

Almost like she knows that she’s being talked about, Goldfish looks up and meows at the phone. Adam rubs her head absently. “Having a cat doesn’t mean I can’t stay in a motel.”

“It means you have to sneak her in.”

“Have you ever heard of pet-friendly motels, Bruce? Because those are out there.”

“No motels,” Bruce says firmly, and Adam bites back a sigh. “I’m not the only person you know, you can call someone else. What are your other choices?”

Adam thinks about it. “Jon,” he says at last, “but his dogs don’t like Goldfish, so I’d rather not. Peake’s place is too small, and Spoole and Lawrence just moved in together, so I don’t want to get in the middle of that.”

“What about James and Elyse?”

“What about them?”

Adam can almost hear Bruce rolling his eyes. “Have you considered staying with them?”

“Yeah,” Adam lies. “But, you know, they have a dog, and it’s a lot of effort to get all the cat stuff set up with a dog there, and-”

“Okay, I’m gonna stop you right there.” Bruce sighs. “Adam.”

“Yes, Bruce.”

“James and Elyse will not care if you need to put a litterbox in their bathroom for one day.”

“Well, they might.”

“Okay, sure. What’s your real reason for avoiding them?”

“That is the real reason.”

“It’d better be a good real reason.”

Adam personally thinks that “I’m not sure I can be in close proximity to both James and Elyse for too long without exploding from months of pent-up romantic frustration” is a damn good reason, but it’s also not necessarily great to say out loud. It’s a little embarrassing for one, and incredibly secret for another.

“They don’t need to deal with me and Goldfish,” Adam says, scratching Goldfish under her chin. She makes a pleased little noise and settles in on his lap. “Bruce, it’s fine, it’s one night in a motel. We’ll be back home the next day.”

“Yeah, no,” Bruce says, with an edge that means that he’s going to take action, dammit. Adam is pretty sure he’s fucked. “I’m going to run interference here.”

“Bruce, no.”

“Bruce, yes. Stay tuned for updates, because this isn’t over.”

“No, Bruce don’t-” Adam pulls his phone away from his ear. Bruce hung up. What a surprise. He looks down at Goldfish. “He’s going to do something,” he tells her seriously.

Goldfish makes an inquisitive noise, and Adam settles in and stays tuned for updates.

.

The update comes a few hours later, in the form of Elyse calling him.

Adam looks at Goldfish, who migrated off of his lap sometime during the second episode of his NCIS marathon. “Do you think I should answer?”

Goldfish meows at him and jumps off the couch to rub her face against his feet.

“I don’t know what that means,” he tells her, and answers the phone. “Elyse, hey.”

“Hi there, Adam!” Elyse says, which puts him on guard immediately. She sounds too chipper. “How’re things?”

“They’re, you know.” Adam shrugs, even though he knows she can’t see him. “Things.”

“Good, that’s great. Hey, I have a question for you.”

This is not going to end well for him. “What’s your question?”

“Why did we have to hear from _Bruce_ that you’re self-exiling to a motel this weekend?”

“Wellllllll,” Adam says, trying desperately to think of an answer that’ll won’t end in an invitation to stay at the Willems house for a weekend. “It only just came up. You know cockroaches, they’re sneaky little fuckers, you wake up one day and they’re just everywhere.”

“No,” Elyse says, “I don’t know cockroaches, because I live in a nice house instead of a dump.”

“What, you’ve never lived in a bad apartment?”

“You’re deflecting,” she says accusingly. “Stop. You’re not staying in a motel, you’re going to be with us. It’s one night.”

“Elyse, no, I don’t want to-”

“Don’t you dare say the word impose, or intrude, or any of that.”

“None of that,” James yells from the background, which is just great. It means that Elyse has backup if she needs it. Adam does not, other than Goldfish, and she’d be shitty backup. He’s going to lose this fight.

He tries anyways. “I don’t want to have to drag Goldfish’s stuff into your place, it’s not a big deal to stay-”

“Is this honestly about your cat?”

“Yes,” Adam lies firmly. “And Alfred, I don’t want to upset him.”

“Our dog isn’t going to be upset by a cat, or by you. You can stay the whole weekend, don’t even worry about it.”

“It’s only Friday night, you don’t-”

“Oh my god,” Elyse sighs, and then a little farther away from the phone, “See, I told you he’d be doing this. We’ve gotta double-team him.”

“No, you don’t,” Adam says uselessly.

“Yeah, we do,” James says, sounding a lot closer. “Adam, we appreciate your consideration, but if you go to a motel, then the only thing in that entire motel that won’t be completely disgusting will be you. If you come to our house, then that won’t be true.”

“Because we’re not disgusting,” Elyse finishes. “It’s not a big deal.”

“It’ll be like a sleepover, we’ll braid each other’s hair and talk about cute girls.”

Adam can’t stop himself from snorting at that. “What kind of sleepovers did you go to?”

“Uh, the best kind?” James scoffs. “The only sleepovers worth going to involve talking about cute girls.”

“I used to talk about Lindsay Lohan,” Elyse says. “She was my go-to cute girl.”

“See, Elyse shared hers. You have to come over, I want to find out who your cute girl is.”

Adam doesn’t say “your wife,” because that’s kind of fucked up, but he comes closer than he wants to admit. He looks down at Goldfish and tilts his phone away from his mouth. “What do you think, should we go?”

“Adam,” James says, “your cat’s opinion doesn’t matter.”

“It matters!” he protests, even though he knows James is absolutely right. “She’s my roommate.”

“I thought the roaches were your roommates,” Elyse says, which. She might have a point there. Adam hasn’t actually checked to see if there are roaches in his apartment or not, but he wouldn’t be surprised if there are.

“They don’t pay rent,” he mutters, which is nonsense and he knows it.

And then, because he wants to make Adam’s life as hard as possible, James pulls what must be the trump card. “Come on, you haven’t come over in weeks. We miss hanging out with you.”

Adam’s fucked. Really, actually fucked.

“If you’re sure,” he starts, and James and Elyse groan in unison. “What?”

“Would we call you if we weren’t sure?” Elyse says exasperatedly. “Come over on Friday night, we’re spending the weekend together.”

“We’re not asking anymore,” James adds. “We’re telling. We’ll kidnap you, and your little cat too.”

“You don’t know how to take care of a cat,” Adam says.

“That’s why we’re also kidnapping you,” James says patiently. “Friday night. Not a question.”

“Yeah, fine,” Adam sighs. This was inevitable. He knew it was. “Friday night.”

Elyse lets out a little hmph. “Took you long enough.”

“I know.” Adam pauses, trying to think of something else to say to that, but there’s nothing. “Thank you,” he adds, because it needs to be said.

“Any time,” James says, with a note of finality to it. Adam is pretty sure he actually means “every time.”

“We’ll see you Friday,” Elyse adds forcefully.

“Friday,” Adam repeats. He hangs up and looks at Goldfish. “Are you ready to meet a dog?”

Goldfish sniffs and walks away. He can’t blame her for that.

.

From: Bruce (4:17 PM)  
I told you I was running interference

To: Bruce (4:20 PM)  
Fuck you

From: Bruce (4:21 PM)  
quit being an asshole about this

From: Bruce (4:21 PM)  
it’s just a weekend they want to see you

To: Bruce (4:22 PM)  
They see me all the time

From: Bruce (4:24 PM)  
shut the fuck up and accept hospitality, adam

.

There’s something incomparably shitty about falling in love with two of your best friends. Two married, incredibly in love best friends. Who are unendingly patient with Adam pulling back and avoiding them. Who his cat loves. Who have never been anything but generous and gracious towards him. Who probably don’t understand why he’s not really talking to them anymore but are letting him do it anyways.

Yeah, the less said about that shit, the better. All it does is twist the knife.

The thing is that the avoidance tactics don’t actually solve any problems. It actually makes them worse. It creates a cycle. Adam avoids James and Elyse, they worry about him, he feels bad about it, he stops avoiding them, they’re warm and perfect and Adam gets nervous and starts avoiding them. It’s ugly. It’s not going to end well.

Actually, Adam isn’t sure how it’s going to end, which is somehow worse. He can’t cut ties with them and only them, Bruce would kill him for it. And he’s not about to tell them what’s going on, at least not yet. So they’re stuck. He can’t get closer, he can’t get farther.

He has his hopes about what could happen, but who is he kidding? James and Elyse are, well, James and Elyse. They’re the blond-haired blue-eyed American dream. They’re beautiful. They’re in love. He’s not going to force his way in the middle of that. And there’s no good ending here, but Adam can’t help but feel that they’re heading towards some kind of ending anyways.

.

James and Elyse call him three times at work on Friday, well before he’s supposed to show up at their house. It would be irritating - actually, it’s still a little irritating - if Adam didn’t know why they were doing it. He’s gotten very good at avoiding them, but he’s also he’s gotten in the habit of saying he “just forgot” when he was supposed to meet them. It’s a shitty excuse, but it was kind of effective, except they’ve apparently caught on.

On James’s third reminder, Adam picks up on the first ring and says “I know, I’ll be there.” No point in niceties on the third call.

“Yeah,” James says, “just like you were going to be over for dinner a couple weeks ago. It’s insurance, Adam.”

“James,” Adam says, trying to sound like there’s no guilt suddenly twisting at his insides, “I’m not going to leave Goldfish in the apartment during fumigation. If nothing else, I’m going to do it for her, trust me.”

“I feel great knowing that you care about your cat more than my feelings.”

Adam shrugs, even if James can’t see him. “But you’re not surprised.”

“Your dedication to your cat stopped surprising me a long time ago.” There’s a long pause, which Adam takes to brace himself for the same thing that James always says, and then: “She’s not even a gold cat!”

“No, she’s not,” Adam says.

“Our dog is named Alfred because he’s black and white, and it looks like a butler’s suit.”

“I’ve met your dog before.”

“Then you know!” James half-shouts. “You know that it makes sense! Calling your grey cat Goldfish doesn’t make sense!”

“Goldfish makes perfect sense,” Adam says mildly, going back to his computer. “I’ll be there tonight, don’t worry.”

There’s noise in the background, something like Elyse’s voice. James laughs. “Oh, wait, Adam, someone wants to say hi.”

Adam raises his eyebrows. “Is it Elyse?”

“Nope,” James says cheerfully. There’s the sound of movement, and then there’s a meow. One that he recognizes.

Adam’s phone almost falls out of his hand. “Is that my cat?”

James laughs. Goldfish meows again. Adam can’t believe his goddamn ears. “Are you in my fucking apartment right now?”

“Yep!” Elyse says in the background.

“It’s insurance, Adam,” James says again, all too seriously. “Insurance, and the fact that you’re supposed to have your cat out of here by two o’clock, and it’s after one, and we don’t want your cat to die.”

“That’s not-” Adam thinks back to the fumigation notice. He doesn’t remember a time being on it, but that doesn’t mean there wasn’t one. “How do you even know that?”

“Oh, we were originally just going to take your cat and whatever you packed for the weekend just because we can,” James answers. “But then we saw the notice and realized that we were actually doing you a favor by kidnapping her. You’re welcome.”

“I gave you a key in case of emergencies,” Adam says, trying to sound offended. “Not to take my cat from her own house.”

“We’re taking her to save her life, Adam,” Elyse says, closer to the phone now. “We’re going to set up a food bowl and introduce her to Alfred. All the same things we do for you when you’re over.”

“Now he has to come!” James says gleefully. “We’re geniuses.” Elyse makes an affronted noise, and James sighs. “Okay, your idea. You’re a genius.”

“Good,” Elyse says. There’s some shuffling and what sounds like lip smacking, which means that she probably just kissed him. “Make sure you come right after work, okay?”

“Right after work,” Adam repeats, hoping he sounds something close to normal and not like he’s been clubbed over the head, because that’s sort of how he feels. “I’ll be there.”

He hangs up before they have the chance to make any more threats to his personal property, and he buries his face in his hands. Kissing. They kiss each other. Of course they do, they’re married, but he’s pretty sure that he’s going to implode if they do it while he’s there. Which they will. Because they’re married and they’re not going to stop being affectionate just because he’s there. They don’t have to change who they are for his sake. They’re not going to do that.

And, he thinks dismally, they’re taking his tiny, shy cat to meet a dog. Not that they’d ever let anything bad happen to Goldfish, and not that Alfred is the kind of dog to give her any kind of shit. It’s just an indicator of how things are going: far, far out of his control. He already doesn’t like where this is going.

Adam gets off work in a little under four hours. That means that he has four hours to figure out how to mentally prepare himself for what’s going to be an abysmal weekend. He sighs, closes the spreadsheet in front of him, and goes to Reddit. He’s going to need a boost for this.

.

Elyse sends him pictures of Goldfish and Alfred every ten minutes until he gets off work. The last one is of them both curled up on the couch together. Adam’s cat is a fucking traitor.

.

The first thing Elyse does when Adam knocks on the door is pull him into a fierce, tight hug.

“What,” Adam says, muffled by Elyse’s shoulder. “Hi?”

“Shut the fuck up, I haven’t seen you in like a month,” Elyse answers.

Right to the guilt trip, then. Adam fights down a sigh. “I know. Sorry.”

“You’d better be.” Elyse steps back and pulls him into the house, closing the door behind him. “I feel like I need to show you around and give you the tour. It’s been so long since you’ve been over that you’re practically a stranger.”

“He might as well be,” James points out, coming around a corner.

“Are you going to hug me too?” Adam asks, because he actually has a deep-seated masochistic streak.

James gives him a serious look and takes a step forward, placing his hands on Adam’s shoulders. “Yes,” he says solemnly, and pulls Adam forward to give him the most uncomfortably gentle hug he’s ever experienced.

“Guys, what the fuck,” Adam says, hoping James can’t feel how fast his heart is beating. At first he was worried that they were going to demand explanations or try to guilt him to stay longer, but now he’s pretty sure they just want to kill him with kindness.

“We thought you didn’t love us anymore,” James whispers, mock-tearful. “You left us behind and broke our hearts, Adam. We missed you like a missing limb.”

“Or like scissors,” Elyse adds. “When you need to find the scissors to cut something open, and you can’t remember where they are. Because the scissors are avoiding you.”

Adam steps back from James to give Elyse a flat look. She holds her ground, glaring back at him.

“I told you not to say the scissors thing,” James mutters. “Now he’s going to leave again.”

“I can’t, you still have my cat,” Adam points out.

“She’s our cat now,” James says immediately.

Elyse nods. “She’s in our house, we get dibs.”

“You do not get dibs, that’s not how it works,” Adam says. “Where’s my cat, what did you do to her, I’m scared.”

“Last I saw, she was in the spare room, with your things.” Elyse gives Adam a significant look. “Do you remember where the spare room is? We can show you.”

“We might want to show him anyways,” James stage-whispers. “Just in case.”

Adam rolls his eyes. “I know where the spare room is.”

“Then by all means.” James takes a step back and sweeps his arms dramatically down the hall, where Adam already knows the spare room is. “Your bedchambers, my lord.”

“I know where the spare room is,” Adam repeats, and he means to walk away, but something stops him. He looks between them, James staring expectantly at him and Elyse with her eyebrows raised, and feels like squirming. They’re giving him a room for the weekend when all he needed was a couch for the night. They’re so _good._ “But seriously, guys, thank you for-”

“Nope!” Elyse says loudly. Adam gives her his best affronted look, but she just shakes her head. “You don’t have to thank us.”

“But,” Adam says, because he still has to try. “You guys are-”

“We’re doing what you would do,” James says, surprisingly gentle. “It’s not that big of a deal, Adam.”

“And when the roaches come for us, we’ll crash your apartment,” Elyse adds. “It’s only fair.”

Adam nods. “All right,” he says, even though he knows that there will never be roaches in this house, and also that he’d pay for James and Elyse to stay in a hotel before he let them sleep in his shithole of an apartment.

“Now, let’s try this again.” James gestures down the halls again. “Your bedchambers, my lord.”

“You’re not funny,” Adam lies, and starts down the hall. He’s stayed in the spare room a handful of times before, and it’s not a bad place to be, all told. It’s probably nicer than his apartment, which is sad, considering that it’s just an empty room with an extra mattress on the floor. He thinks he’s stayed there more than anyone else. Or, well, he used to. It’s been a couple of months since he stayed the night.

The spare room is the same as he remembers, which is good, because if they went and painted it or remodeled Adam doesn’t think he would feel at home anymore. His suitcase, with enough things for the weekend and no more, is sitting on the bed, and Alfred is curled up asleep in the corner. Most importantly, Goldfish is waiting for him, sprawled across the pillows. Adam doesn’t hesitate before picking her up and burying his nose in his fur. “I’m sorry they kidnapped you,” he murmurs against the back of her neck. She meows at him, which could mean any number of things.

“Actually,” he says after a moment, “I’m not, because that way you didn’t get fumigated. That would’ve sucked.” He can’t believe that he forgot to get his fucking cat out of his apartment in time, he’s the worst cat owner in history, but James and Elyse had his back. They have a way of doing that.

Goldfish meows again, and Adam sets her back on the pillows. She picks herself up, pads over to Alfred, and drops down next to him.

“Oh my god,” Adam says. Cats are supposed to be afraid of dogs. Cats are supposed to avoid dogs. And here’s his cat going to spend time with a dog. With James and Elyse’s dog. Goldfish is the biggest traitor Adam has ever met.

“You know we can hear you, right?” James says from the doorway.

Adam is proud that he doesn’t jump, just turns around to face James. “I’m allowed to talk to my cat in the comfort of my bedchambers.”

James’s lips quirk up into a smile. “Then I’m allowed to judge you from the comfort of my living room, where my wife and I have Chinese food and sci-fi movies.”

“You already got Chinese food?”

“The delivery guy got here five minutes before you did.” James pauses. “By the way, hide your car keys. Elyse was talking about taking them so you couldn’t escape.”

“Why,” Adam says helplessly, even though he already knows. He’s been running away an awful lot lately.

James must know that he doesn’t have to answer, because he doesn’t. He just cranes his neck to look at Goldfish and Alfred. “You know, you could take a picture and sell it to Animal Planet. You’d never have to work again.”

“Animal Planet doesn’t want a picture of my cat that badly,” Adam says. “Nobody cares about cats and dogs anymore, it’s all about weird animals being friends. Foxes and hounds, and all that shit. This picture wouldn’t sell.”

“Well, take one anyways,” James says, and heads back to the living room. Adam has no doubt that when he follows James he’s going to find kung pao beef and fried rice with his name on it, waiting for him. Probably with extras so he can have leftovers if he wants them. He’s never going to understand what the fuck he did to deserve James and Elyse, but here he is. Confused as ever.

Adam goes to the living room. But not before he takes a picture of Goldfish and Alfred, curled together in the corner.

.

To: Bruce, Joel (6:17 PM)  
something something cats and dogs getting along joke  
Attachment: 201602201817.jpg

From: Joel (6:18 PM)  
Do my eyes deceive me or is Adam finally at House Willems?

From: Joel (6:18 PM)  
Has he finally gotten over whatever bullshit funk he was in?

From: Joel (6:18 PM)  
Praise be. It’s about time.

To: Joel (6:20 PM)  
This is why I don’t tell you what’s going on in my life

From: Bruce (6:21 PM)  
why is joel pouting what did you do

To: Bruce (6:22 PM)  
It was a JOKE

From: Bruce (6:23 PM)  
i told you the dog wouldn’t be a problem

From: Bruce (6:23 PM)  
seriously man have a good weekend you deserve a break from work

.

The shittiest part of this whole thing-

-well, okay, there are a lot of shitty parts it, and all of them feel like the shittiest at one point or another, but Adam keeps coming back to this in particular: he doesn’t know when or how he actually fell in love. Which is bullshit, because this is changing his life and how he interacts with two of his best friends. It feels like he should at least know how he got here.

All he knows, really, is that one day he went to talk to James and Elyse and his heart was pounding. He remembers thinking _why_ and then _oh, shit_ and he slammed face-first into reality. Reality, where he’s in love with not one but two beautiful, bright people who also adore him, in some context or another. Reality, where he’s stuck in an endless loop of trying to figure out how he got here. Reality, where they’re married.

He holds onto that last part, more often than not. James and Elyse are married. Everything else is malleable, it’s all something that could change or fade or shift. But James and Elyse are married and that isn’t about to change anytime soon. It’s his touchstone, his mantra, his own self-imposed limitation. In his more romantic moments he uses that to ground himself. The reality of the world around him has fucked him a few different times, but he’d rather be fucked by knowing where he stands than by forgetting.

.

The second Adam walks into the living room, Elyse grabs his wrist and tows him over to the couch. “Sit,” she says before pushing him down.

Adam lets himself plop onto the couch. “I can sit down on my own, you know.”

“Don’t bother,” James calls from the kitchen.

Elyse sits next to him. “We’re having a sleepover,” she announces.

“Yes, we are,” Adam says patiently. “We talked about this.”

“Oh, good, you remember.” Elyse tips over sideways so she’s leaning against the arm of the couch, looking up at him. “Are you going to braid my hair?”

Adam thinks about it. He’s braided hair before. It hasn’t really gone well, considering that he has no clue how to do it, but he’s done it.

“Do you want me to?” he says carefully.

Elyse shudders. “Nope, you are not allowed to touch my hair.”

“I’m not either,” James says as he comes in. “Did you know we owned a tray?”

“James, I live here,” Elyse says. “I knew about the tray.”

James looks at Elyse, completely blank. “When did you move in?”

“A month or two ago. I was hoping you wouldn’t notice.”

“I didn’t know about the tray,” Adam says, which is actually true. He does remember James complaining once, a couple months ago, about how they couldn’t be fancy without a tray for serving drinks. What with the whole “complete avoidance” thing he had going, he didn’t know that they’d actually bought the tray.

James must know that, because he gives Elyse an incredibly deliberate look as he sets the tray down on the coffee table. “Well, we bought a tray. It’s supposed to be for fine dining, so we’re using it for our takeout tonight.”

“That sounds fine to me,” Adam says. There’s fried rice and kung pao beef in the middle of the tray. He already knows it’s for him.

“We ordered extra, in case you need leftovers,” James says, and settles in on the couch next to Adam, so he’s trapped between them. Adam actually kind of hates his life.

“Hey,” Elyse says, sounding a little softer. Adam looks at her in surprise, and she gives him a lopsided smile. “Welcome back.”

Adam doesn’t know what to say to that, and she must know, because she grabs the remote and turns the TV on. “We’re going to watch Jupiter Ascending.”

“What the fuck, why,” Adam says, even though he knows he shouldn’t bother.

“Eddie Redmayne,” James answers, far too seriously to actually mean it.

“Yeah,” Elyse agrees, curling up more comfortably in the couch. “Eddie Redmayne. And Mila Kunis.”

James leans in closer to Adam, and Adam is stupidly proud of how he doesn’t react at all, not even when James whispers in Adam’s ear, “It’s mostly Mila Kunis.”

“I can’t argue with that logic,” Adam murmurs. James laughs, low and warm and directly in Adam’s ear, and not reacting gets a lot harder.

“Between you and me, Eddie Redmayne is the worst part of the movie,” James says conspiratorially.

Adam raises an eyebrow and, against literally all of his better judgment telling him not to, turns to whisper directly to James, but for a second he can’t. As expected, James’s face is a few inches from his, and even worse, he’s _smiling._ Mostly Adam can keep a relatively normal demeanor around James and Elyse, but there are moments like this, moments where the warmth he’s facing is so genuine and undeniable and directly in front of him, that he can’t do it. He can’t think for all of two seconds. James, for his part, doesn’t look concerned that Adam has forgotten to speak, which somehow makes it all worse. Most people would be tired of his bullshit by now, but not them. Never them.

After Adam manages to recover enough to remember how words work, he manages to say, “I thought the worst part of the movie was the movie.”

James’s eyes crinkle a little at the corners. Adam thinks, abstractly, that it would be incredibly easy to kiss him. If it weren’t for the way every part of his brain is screaming not to, he thinks he would. He wishes he could.

“It’s been a while since I watched it,” James says, and thankfully, blessedly, moves away from Adam so he’s settled back against the couch. Adam does the same and wills his heart to slow down so that neither of them notice that he’s having fucking palpitations.

“Then it’s time to return to the greatest movie of 2015,” Elyse says confidently, pointing the remote at the TV.

“Uh, you’re forgetting the Minions movie,” James says immediately.

“Oh, I was going to say Pan,” Adam adds.

Elyse laughs. “All serious contenders. We can watch them all.”

“Yes,” James says immediately.

Luckily, having anticipated this, Adam manages to say at the same time, “No way.”

“We’ll get through them with booze,” Elyse decides, and hits play.

Adam reaches for his kung pao beef and settles in. At least, God willing, he can watch a questionable movie with his friends. That’s a good night, objectively speaking. He needs a good night.

.

Adam loves James and Elyse. It’s a simple truth, if a secret one, and one he doesn’t have a problem with. What he forgets sometimes, embarrassingly enough, is that he likes them. He’s almost forgotten that they’re all friends, but it’s impossible to forget when James and Elyse keep sniping back and forth about whether or not Jupiter Ascending is a good movie or if Eddie Redmayne can act. They pull him into their orbit and into their conversation and it’s easy to slip back in like nothing ever changed. It’s just like it’s always been: James and Elyse, making Adam feel like he belongs.

.

Two beers in and a quarter of the way through Minions (which, really, Adam doesn’t know how Elyse found it on demand so fast, but he’s not going to question her abilities) Goldfish pads out and jumps on James’s lap.

“Oh my god, what,” James says immediately, going completely rigid.

Adam glances over, fighting back a smile. “She likes you.”

“Adam, your cat is on me,” James whispers loudly. “What do I do, she’s so tiny, do I let her stay there?”

“What else could you do?”

“Pick her up and give her to Elyse?”

Elyse starts scrambling off the couch, phone in hand. “Hold still, I want to get a picture of this.”

“She’s too small,” James says, now more confidently. “No animals are supposed to be this small, ever in their lives.”

“What about at birth,” Adam says, because he’s pretty sure he remembers when Alfred was a puppy. He was definitely this small at one point.

James shakes his head. “Animals are born as big as they’re ever going to get, and that is a scientific fact.”

Adam raises an eyebrow at him, painfully aware of Elyse tapping away at her phone and probably taking a fuckton of pictures of him and James. “I don’t think that’s how it works.”

“No, I have a wife with a uterus, she’ll know how it works.” James turns to Elyse. “That’s how it works, right?”

“My uterus doesn’t have enough experience to answer,” Elyse answers, and plops back down on the couch. “We need a picture of all three of us, in order to commemorate this.”

“Is this a special occasion?” Adam mutters, but Elyse is already adjusting her phone and sticking her arm out in determined selfie fashion.

“You’re special, Adam,” James answers, and leans in, propping his chin on Adam’s shoulder. Adam keeps his face carefully blank, partly to avoid reacting and partly because that’s the only right way to take a selfie.

“Say mozzarella,” Elyse chirps, and takes the selfie.

“Provolone,” Adam says, because no one ever accused him of being anything other than an asshole.

“You suck,” Elyse answers easily, and settles back in on the couch. “Aw, we forgot to pause the movie, we don’t know what’s happening now.”

Adam blinks. “Did you know what was happening to begin with?”

“There’s still a cat on my lap,” James announces. “I think she’s asleep.”

“Yeah, she does that.” Adam leans over and rubs Goldfish’s head. She doesn’t move at all, but Adam smiles anyways. It’s good that Goldfish likes James. His cat has good taste.

“Your cat has good taste,” Elyse says, because she’s a psychic sometimes. Adam doesn’t know how she does it.

James still looks mildly alarmed by the bundle of grey fur in his lap. “This is weird. She’s so warm.”

“Doesn’t Alfred sit with you guys?”

“That’s different. It’s less of him sitting on us and more of us sitting under him. This-” James gestures at his lap - “is too small.”

“She’s cute, though,” Adam says.

“She has the right idea, sleeping through this movie,” James mutters.

“We should watch Muppet Treasure Island,” Elyse decides. “It’s a lot better than this.”

“That’s a weirdly specific movie to watch,” Adam says. He’s already seen it a handful of times, and every single time was because of Elyse.

Elyse grins. “That sounds like a yes, we’re changing movies, you can’t stop me.”

“No, I can’t,” James says, looking pointedly back at his lap. “I’m not used to this, I don’t go to Adam’s house enough to be used to this happening.”

“I do,” Elyse says brightly, and then falters. “I mean. It’s been a while, but I’m still probably used to it.”

Adam, who is not a flexible person, is impressed by the emotional gymnastics that send him straight back on a guilt trip. For all that his apartment is a shithole and Elyse (and everyone else they know) isn’t afraid to remind him of it, she still used to come over for brunch every now and again. Goldfish loved sitting with her. In fact, that was one of the things that had inspired him cutting them out: he’d looked at Elyse petting Goldfish one day and thought about how much he loved his girls, and then realized in a panic that Elyse wasn’t his.

“Then you take the cat,” James says desperately. “She’s so small, I’m going to break her.”

“You won’t break my cat,” Adam says in exasperation. “If that was going to happen, it would’ve been earlier when you kidnapped her, not now that she’s sleeping.”

James looks down at his lap. “Sorry for kidnapping you, cat.”

“She has a name, James,” Elyse says, sounding offended. “You can use it.”

“Sorry for kidnapping you, inexplicably-named Goldfish,” James says promptly.

Adam sighs. “There’s an explanation-”

“Not good enough, her name should be Silverfish.”

“She’s not shiny enough to be silver.”

James arches an eyebrow at him. “She’s shiny enough to be gold?”

“What’s the explanation?” Elyse says. “I thought you just picked the name to be weird about it, is there a real story?”

Adam sighs. If anyone deserves to know the story, it’s the people who saved his cat from being fumigated. “You know how Jon has that fish and he never tells anyone what its name is?”

“That’s an ugly goldfish,” James says.

“I don’t think goldfish can be ugly,” Adam points out, but he relents. “The fish’s name matches my cat’s name.”

There’s a minute of silence as they absorb this, and then James blinks at him. “Adam, tell me his goldfish’s name isn’t Grey Cat.”

“Well,” Adam says.

“Holy shit, it _is,_ ” Elyse says, staring at Adam wide-eyed. “Is that why he won’t tell anyone, because he knows it doesn’t make any sense?”

“We were drunk,” Adam mumbles, face beginning to heat up. “It was supposed to be a solidarity thing, because I just adopted Goldfish and I couldn’t pick a name, but he fucking backed out of it and doesn’t say the fish’s name. So now I just look like an asshole who can’t name a pet right.”

“Yeah, you do,” James says, but he’s grinning.

“Adam, you’re the greatest,” Elyse announces. “Even if that amazing story interrupted the Minions movie, it was worth it, and I love you.”

And Adam has done a lot of stupid, cruel things to himself, emotionally and mentally before, but he thinks the cruelest thing he’ll ever do is just accept what she says at face value.

“But I love your cat more,” she adds, and James runs a hand down Goldfish’s back, and the moment passes. And Adam has never been more grateful for Goldfish than he is right now.

.

 **Elyse Willems** @ElyseWillems  
At last, I know @jonrisinger’s fish’s name! I am the most powerful person I know.

 **Joel Rubin-Greene** @JoelRubinGreene  
@ElyseWillems @jonrisinger WHAT. How did you find out this magic?

 **Elyse Willems** @ElyseWillems  
@JoelRubinGreene @jonrisinger A little birdie told me. A bearded bird.

 **Joel Rubin-Greene** @JoelRubinGreene  
@ElyseWillems @jonrisinger @adamkovic how did you know Jon’s fish’s name?

 **Adam Kovic** @adamkovic  
@JoelRubinGreene @ElyseWillems @jonrisinger sorry Jon

.

James falls asleep halfway through Muppet Treasure Island.

“It’s because he’s seen it so many times,” Elyse murmurs drowsily, from where she’s leaning against Adam’s shoulder. Both of them are. He’s sandwiched firmly between two Willemses, and the nice thing about having three beers is that he doesn’t mind it so much anymore. Goldfish is still firmly in James’s lap, and Adam would pet her if he weren’t concerned that he’d accidentally end up groping James’s crotch.

“But it’s still a good movie,” Adam says, both surprised and not surprised by the sleepiness in his own voice.

“It is,” Elyse says, and pauses it, pushing herself upright. Her cheeks are flushed, but she looks serious, and Adam wonders if he should be nervous. “Hey.”

“Hi,” Adam says, because he’s not sure what else to say.

“We missed you,” Elyse says. Adam opens his mouth to say something - he’s not sure what, but he has to be able to think of something - only for her to shake her head. “No. Listen to me, all right, this is important.”

Adam swallows. “Okay?”

“We don’t know what’s going on inside your head. We’re assuming it’s something that matters and is important, but whatever it is that happened, you can talk to us about it.” Elyse pauses, eyes flicking to her sleeping husband, and looks back firmly at Adam. “Together or separately. It’s all right.”

And Adam thinks he could. He thinks that now, when things are hazy and happy, it’d be easy to kiss Elyse or say that he’s having feelings for them both. He could do it and he could almost forgive himself for doing it, too.

“I’ll be over more often, don’t worry,” he says instead. It’s not cowardice, he tells himself. It’s self-preservation. It’s better for them all.

“No,” Elyse says, and Adam blinks in surprise. “You missed the point.”

“I thought the point was that you missed me.”

“The point is that we want you to be happy and comfortable.” Elyse sighs, her face visibly falling, and Adam’s stomach sinks along with it. “If that means that you don’t want to be around us anymore, as much or at all, that’s fine. We’d appreciate an explanation for whatever it is, but you can do what you need to do, and we won’t blame you. But if you need to talk-”

“No, oh my god,” Adam interrupts, no longer able to contain the sheer horror he’s feeling.

There’s a quarter second of real, raw hurt on Elyse’s face before she bounces back. “Okay, no talking,” she says, and Adam hates himself for how brittle she sounds. “That’s fine too.”

“No, fuck, I-” Adam sighs, dropping his head against the back of the couch. “That was timed wrong, let me try again. It’s not anything you’re doing wrong, it’s just me being a piece of shit-”

“With your own perfectly valid feelings,” Elyse reminds him.

Adam really wishes that Elyse were less loving and accepting. It’d make all of this a lot easier. “With my own perfectly valid feelings and personal bullshit that I need to figure out. I haven’t been good company for anyone lately, and you guys deserve to see me when I’m at my best, people-wise.”

Elyse frowns. “We don’t need your best,” she says, and Adam feels the silence around them get even quieter, the way it does before he hears something that really matters. “We just need you.”

Adam doesn’t know what to say. He thinks he opens his mouth, but the blood is rushing in his ears, and he was right. That mattered. That mattered in a way he feels in his ribs, resonating hollow inside his chest, deeper and better than he ever expected he could.

Because she’s incredible, Elyse seems to know that he can’t possibly answer that, not in any significant way. She just settles back against his shoulder and hits play on the movie again, like she hasn’t just changed the world.

.

 **Adam Kovic** @adamkovic  
bedtime pic.twitter.co/kl23L28n @JamesWillems @ElyseWillems

 **James Willems** @JamesWillems  
@adamkovic You forgot to say that your cat was on my lap.

 **Adam Kovic** @adamkovic  
@JamesWillems you’re right, hang on

 **Adam Kovic** @adamkovic  
I have been reminded to tell you all that my cat was also there, asleep on James’s lap. Carry on.

.

Adam has had one underlying assumption for this whole ordeal, ever since it started. It’s been a pretty simple baseline, and it’s colored every single choice he’s made.

Murphy’s Law.

Things like this don’t work out. It’s a universal constant Whatever happens, it won’t go well. Avoidance will end with James and Elyse giving up on him. Bringing it up will end with them rejecting him kindly and giving up on him. Trying to carry on like nothing had changed actually kills Adam on the inside, and as much as he loves James and Elyse he’s going to avoid causing himself that much pain. Either way, someone ends up hurt and unhappy, more than likely him, and whatever he does is liable to end badly.

The thing is, he thinks he underestimated James and Elyse. He doesn’t know how to handle himself sometimes, but they know how to handle him. The whole damn reason he loves them to begin with is because they understand him, because they’re undyingly patient with whatever he does and they’re happy when he’s there. And before now he thought that was a burden, some kind of proof that he didn’t deserve them. He figured that they would just move on and find more friends and live their lives.

But Elyse - and, he would assume, James too - wants him there. No, not wants, she said “needs” and that makes it better and worse all at once. And because they are who they are, they want him to be happy. They want to understand what’s going on.

Adam couldn’t say anything in the moment, but with Elyse and James asleep on his shoulders, with Muppet Treasure Island playing out in the background, with Alfred wandering out and promptly dropping to sit on Adam’s feet - he thinks about it. Actually thinks about it. They won’t do anything they don’t want to for his sake, of course, but they’ll let him down easy. They’ll make him comfortable. They’ll be kind about it, if nothing else.

Things go wrong, and sometimes people are bad, but James and Elyse aren’t just people. James and Elyse are possibly the two most important humans that Adam has met in his life. They matter to him, and he forgot somehow in all of the drama he was creating inside his mind that he matters to them too.

“This is going to be all right,” he says, and neither of them stir in their sleep, but for the first time, he thinks he believes it.

.

BCC: akov@mcgovernapartments.com  
From: bmcw@mcgovernapartments.com  
Subject:

Residents,

During the fumigation process, it was discovered that the McGovern building has a number of potential structural flaws. Unfortunately, due to these flaws, residents will not be able to return to the building for another 24 hours following the fumigation as the building is investigated. We will have a period where residents can collect any additional personal items needed for the weekend. We at the McGovern building appreciate your patience with these procedures to improve your standard of living, and we will be doing our best to keep you updated with the progress of these processes.

Regards,

B. McWilliams  
Superintendent, McGovern Building

.

The first thing Elyse says when Adam shows her the email is “You’re never going back there.”

“All of my things are in that apartment,” Adam points out.

“You’re never going back there,” Elyse repeats. James wanders into the kitchen, and she points at him. “James, tell him he’s never going back there.”

“Adam, you’re never going back there,” James says obediently. “Wherever there is, you’re not going.”

“Guys, literally all of my worldly possessions are in that apartment,” Adam sighs. “Also, I live there.”

James turns to Elyse, who’s in the process of making coffee. “Are we already going through with that plan? What happened?”

“Shh!” Elyse whips her head around to look at Adam. “You didn’t hear that.”

Adam stares. “What plan do you have that involves getting me out of my apartment?”

“Nothing at all,” James says, which is possibly the most blatant lie that Adam has ever heard. “Why aren’t we letting you go back?”

Adam hands over his phone, email still on the screen. James skims it, and Elyse takes the opportunity to look at Adam, half-apologetic. “We do have a plan.”

“You have a plan for if I move out of the apartment,” Adam says. He doesn’t know how he’s surprised, but somehow, he still is.

“No, we have a plan to rescue you from your structurally unsound apartment,” James announces, handing Adam’s phone back. “They discovered that it was unstable while they were spraying for roaches, do you understand why we want you out of there?”

“For the same reasons everyone else wants me out,” Adam sighs. Most everyone he knows had implored him not to move into that apartment when he first found it two years ago. Offers had included Bruce and Joel’s couch, Spoole’s futon, and James and Elyse’s spare room. Adam had said no, not because of the emotional turmoil that would make him say no now but out of a misplaced sense of pride. He’d always figured that it was more important to live independently than to live comfortably. He’s pretty sure that now, a couple years older and wiser, that that’s bullshit, but he never had the chance to move out.

He could now, though. He’s almost surprised to realize it, but it’d be easier now than ever to get himself and Goldfish out of that shithole. His cat deserves to live somewhere nice, and what’s more, he’s pretty sure he does too. It’s his chance to grow the fuck up, and knowing James and Elyse, the most probable plan that they have dovetails nicely with his plan to find some kind of ending for this story. He doesn’t even have to stay forever, just long enough to get his shit together and find somewhere else. It could, theoretically, work out great.

“Yeah, because it’s gross,” James says, bringing Adam back to the present. “You live with cockroaches, Adam.”

“Not that I’m saying yes to any plans,” Adam says cautiously, even if he’s already ready to say yes, “but what would those plans be?”

“Spare room,” James says immediately.

Elyse shrugs. “Yeah, it’s not the fanciest of options, but we don’t have roaches.”

“All right,” Adam says. He knows that he can’t agree, not without talking to them first. He can’t in good conscience move in with them while he’s secretly in love with them both, and if he tells them and they’re not comfortable anymore then he won’t overstay his welcome. But he can go back to his apartment if he has to, and there are other apartments still. Ideally, of course, he won’t be going back to an apartment at all. Strange, how that’s an option now. “Good.”

“What the fuck does that mean?” James mutters. Elyse hands him a cup of coffee and kisses his cheek, and James wrinkles his nose. “You disgust me and you didn’t answer my question.”

“Tough,” Elyse says, and hands Adam a mug of his own. “What’re we doing today, boys?”

“We’re going to figure out if Adam is moving in with us,” James suggests. “Apparently we have an hour today to kidnap any remaining cats in his apartment.”

As if on cue, Goldfish meanders into the kitchen and sits down on Adam’s foot. Adam bends over and picks her up, cradling her in the crook of one elbow. “Did you hear that? They found out about your brothers.”

“Do we have a cat rescue mission?” Elyse demands. “Do we need to save them? Are there lives on the line?”

“Lives on the feline,” Adam answers absently. Goldfish swats a paw at his nose, and he frowns at her. “Don’t you like puns? What’s wrong with you?”

Goldfish, being a fucking ridiculous cat, scrambles around on his arm until she’s hanging over his arm, belly on his elbow and all four paws dangling in the air.

“Goldfish, what the fuck,” Adam says as reasonably as he can. “That can’t possibly be comfortable, what are you trying to do here?”

She doesn’t move. As gently as possible, Adam raises his arm. She doesn’t make a damn sound. Adam is constantly amazed by the general existence of cats, and this is no exception to that. Apparently, the most comfortable she can be right now is sprawled over his arm.

“Guys, my cat’s broken,” Adam announces, looking up at James and Elyse.

“She looks fine to me,” Elyse says. James doesn’t say anything, just leaning back on the counter and watching Adam. He’s smiling, just slightly, and his eyes are warm. Adam has seen James in the mornings before, and he always looks relaxed, like the most excitable parts of him haven’t woken up yet. And he’s looking at Adam like he’s the best thing in the room.

And Adam wonders, just fleetingly, if James and Elyse would offer up their spare room to anyone but him, or if he’s as exceptional to them as they are to him.

“You can work out with her now,” James says abruptly. His smile widens, eyes flickering. “Bicep curls with your cat.”

Adam slides his free hand under Goldfish’s belly, careful of how she tenses as he picks her up. “Better than using any dead weight,” he deadpans. He doesn’t even get through five curls before she starts wriggling, and he sets her carefully on the floor. Goldfish glares up at him balefully for a moment before going to Elyse and rubbing against her leg.

“Aww, she likes me,” Elyse announces, and bends over to pet her. “Look at her, she’s cute. I made a friend today.”

“Next you’re going to find a boyfriend,” James says, and glances over at Adam, now mock-sniffling. “They grow up so fast.”

“I can think of a couple of potential boyfriends,” Elyse straightens up and taps her chin. “Would Bruce and Joel date me?”

“What, both of them?” Adam blurts out before he can stop himself. James and Elyse turn to look at him in surprise, and he takes the opportunity to mentally kick himself with the foot that he didn’t just shove in his mouth. He’s pretty sure that was some kind of an opening, and he’s also pretty sure that he just missed it.

Elyse and James exchange a look loaded with something that Adam can’t quite parse. After a moment Elyse looks back at him, and her voice is measured when she speaks. “If both of them wanted to, sure. All you need is two or more consenting adults, right?”

Two or more. That’s absolutely an opening. Something about this feels deliberate and weighty in a way that he can’t put his finger on, but he thinks that this is important. And judging by the way that James and Elyse are looking expectantly at him, they think so too.

“Well, yeah,” he manages after a moment, when he finds his voice. “I just - if you were going to go for anyone, would it be Bruce and Joel?”

“You’re right,” Elyse says seriously, and turns to James. “I should’ve said Spoole and Lawrence.”

“Spoole would,” James says thoughtfully. Adam doesn’t doubt it for a second. “I can think of someone better, but Spoole’s a good second choice.”

Adam almost asks who he can think of that’s better, but stops himself at the last second. He’s probably not going to like the answer all too much. He’s just going to settle in with his new knowledge and the uncomfortable twist of hope in his chest.

“But back to business,” Elyse says suddenly, and turns back to Adam. “Do you need to pick up anything else for the weekend? Anything you want to do?”

“I,” Adam says, and pauses. He can’t think of anything he could possibly want to do. “No? And no.”

“Staying home and playing GTA it is!” James says brightly, and downs the rest of his coffee.

Adam looks at Elyse, who shrugs, and back to James. “Sure,” he says. He can’t imagine anything better than that.

.

And really, for how emotionally and socially inept Adam can be, James and Elyse having casual discussions of dating outside their marriage? That’s a signal. He isn’t totally blind. Slow, maybe, but not blind.

He’s not ready to fully hope, to think about what they’re trying to signal, but he figures they’ll tell him soon enough. In the meantime he can play some video games with his friends.

.

In the end, the way they tell him not isn’t dramatic or earth-shattering, which seems about right. The beginning of this wasn’t dramatic, either. Things come to a head during lunch, while GTA is paused and they’re all eating leftover Chinese food, camped out on the floor in front of the couch.

“So,” Elyse says abruptly, looking from James to Adam slowly. “Adam.”

Adam looks at her expectantly, but apparently that’s all that’s forthcoming. “Elyse,” he says, just to be polite, and takes a bite of kung pao beef.

“We,” Elyse says, and then frowns. “Wait, no, I fucked it up, we have to start again.”

“You said one word,” James says in exasperation.

“But I was going to say the wrong next word, I have to start over.”

“Here, I’ll help,” Adam offers, and schools his face into something neutral. “Hello, Elyse, what would you like to discuss?”

“That’s a good opening, you should take that,” James whispers.

Elyse wrinkles her nose at James, but she takes a deep breath and looks at Adam. “All right, we are past the point of being delicate about things, so I’m just going to come out and say it.”

“Okay,” Adam says, and takes a bite of fried rice.

“Just gonna say it,” Elyse says again. “Just going to use my words-”

James buries his face in his hands and groans. Adam casts a worried glance at him, but when she looks back at Elyse, she looks like she’s about to laugh, eyes dancing.

“Use your words to do what?” Adam prompts her. James curls in even farther on himself.

“To speak, Adam,” Elyse says, and there’s an undeniable giggle in her voice. “To say things that James is nervous about, so he doesn’t want me to play with his feelings like this.”

“But you’re still doing it,” James moans. “Elyse, if you don’t ask him out right now, I’m going to do it for you, I swear to god.”

Adam stops breathing.

“Hey,” Elyse whispers furiously, smacking at James’s shoulder, and James looks up. Adam recognizes that James looks guilty, and he suddenly realizes that they’re both nervous, and that’s when his brain wakes back up.

The first thing he acknowledges is that he could’ve misheard it. Maybe he misunderstood a word in there somewhere, and James didn’t say “ask him out.” Maybe his subconscious is trying to make him happy and is instead kind of breaking his heart into a couple million pieces, no big deal, happens all the time. The second thing is that if he heard it right, he could be misinterpreting it, but he’s not going to give that any credit. There’s no way that, if that’s what James said, it could mean literally anything else.

“I think we broke him,” James says quietly. It takes a second for Adam to return to the room he’s in, to realize that James and Elyse are both staring at him. They don’t look nervous anymore, but they sure as hell don’t look like they expected this.

Adam wonders how long he’s been staring at them. Probably longer than he realizes or than they anticipated. He forces himself to swallow, tries to relaxes his shoulders, and says, “Can you run that by me again?”

He wants to cringe at the sound of his own voice, not as light as he wanted but kind of creaky and scared. He manages to keep his gaze steady, even through the mental litany of _oh god, what’s going on, you’re hearing things, you wanted this so much that you’re literally warping reality to make it happen._

“Okay, so we fucked that one up,” Elyse says. She’s better at sounding lighthearted, but she’s laser-focused on Adam, and there’s still a careful measurement when she speaks. “So. Um. We’re asking you out.”

“On a date,” James clarifies, which helps a lot and not at all. Adam kind of wants to pinch himself, but he doesn’t think he can move just yet. “We’ve talked about this for a while, just so you know, and…” he shrugs, looking a little helpless, a little fond. “We like you.”

“And we understand if that’s weird,” Elyse adds. “We don’t know what page you’re on, but I mean, we asked you to move in with us, if it’d be too weird for you to-”

“Wait, did you mean move in permanently?” Adam says before he can stop himself.

“Well, I mean.” James shifts, and he lifts his arm halfway, in what has to be an aborted attempt to reach out to Adam. “As long as you wanted to, sure.”

“Your cat likes our dog, Adam,” Elyse says gently. “And we don’t have cockroaches here.”

“Okay,” Adam says, because that part makes sense. It fits into the whole idea that they like Adam, and he likes them because they’re good people. Nothing wrong with that. “But did you just ask me on a date? That happened, right?”

“It’s okay if you don’t want to,” James says, sounding forcedly casual. “You know, we’re not going to hold it against you or anything, not everyone wants to date everyone.”

“But you want to date me,” Adam says, partly for clarification purposes and partly for the sheer novelty of saying it. After all this time, after months of pining and pulling away, after only just letting himself believe this wouldn’t end with total hell, James and Elyse want to date him.

“Yeah,” Elyse says, and then just looks at him. James doesn’t add anything either, and Adam realizes that he holds the power here. They don’t know. They have no way to know that Adam has been telling himself that he could never have this. And now he has it, right in front of him, perfectly within reach.

“Okay,” Adam says, and a burst of panic pops low in his stomach but he ignores it in favor of the way he can see both James and Elyse’s breath catch in front of him. They mean it. They want to date him. “Yeah. I mean. Does this count? Are we-” he gestures between them all with his chopsticks, hoping the motion will hide the way his hands are shaking, just a little. “Are we on a date right now?”

“I mean, we could be,” James says thoughtfully. “We’ve had date nights with less before.”

“Starting now, though,” Elyse says, and climbs up onto the couch, leaving her leftovers on the floor. James follows her, sitting on the other side, leaving the middle open just like last night. “Here, now that we’re all on the same page, this is going to be a date.”

And Adam doesn’t hesitate, couldn’t if he tried. He sits on the couch between them, and James immediately tips onto his back, his head in Elyse’s lap and his feet dangling over the arm of the couch.

“Wow, okay,” Adam says, trying to hide the sheer giddiness that’s building in his chest. “Getting comfortable, all right.”

Elyse leans up and presses a kiss to Adam’s cheek. “You live here now, that means you can knock him on the floor.”

Adam looks down at James, who gives him an imploring look. “Adam, no, we’re still in the honeymoon phase.”

Adam sighs. “Yeah, he’s right, we’ve gotta be nice for a while.”

“No, you’ve gotta be nice, that’s fine,” Elyse says. “But our honeymoon phase is long over, so-” she shoves at James’s shoulder and he yelps, tipping dangerously towards the edge of the couch.

“Elyse!” James gasps, wriggling around and grabbing Adam’s arm, probably to steady himself. Instead, he just loses his balance and slips, yanking Adam’s arm as he goes.

“Ow,” Adam says mildly, and pulls James up so he’s fully back on the couch. “This is a good date, good job, guys.”

“This is the new best first date I’ve been on,” Elyse says, leaning her head against Adam’s shoulder. “We don’t even have to do anything, it just feels good to be here.”

“We should get all of Adam’s things, though,” James says contemplatively. “He’s ours now, you know.”

“Yours,” Adam repeats, as deadpan as he can, as though his heart didn’t pick up at the word.

“Yeah, dibs,” James says, shifting more comfortably on Adam’s lap.

“You romantic, you,” Elyse says. Adam puts his arm around her waist, hand settling on her hip, and James adjusts his hand to tangle his fingers with Adam’s other hand. Elyse is falling asleep; Adam can tell by how she leans more heavily against him, by how she starts making soft little noises as she adjusts. He thinks he could fall asleep too, even with the midday light streaming in. Everything is bright around the edges, and it all looks soft, ethereal, beautiful.

“Welcome home,” James murmurs, and something pulls tight in Adam’s chest.

Home is Goldfish, curled up at his feet, and home is his XBox and his fridge full of beer after work, and home is the couch that he loves but that Joel has been begging him for years to throw away, and home is the feeling of peace that he gets when he’s where he’s supposed to be, and home is James grinning drowsily up at him and Elyse’s smile pressed into his shoulder. And maybe they’re doing this in the wrong order, having him move in before they even go out together, but that’s all right. Nobody needs the right order, anyways.

“Welcome home,” Adam echoes, and his eyes slip closed.

**Author's Note:**

> This is also cross-posted to [Tumblr!](http://elysewillcms.tumblr.com/private/141411522122/tumblr_o4df56tsMn1rv5uzi) The title comes from [Nothing Without Love](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ssVvkfcL9HI) by Nate Ruess, and much of the inspiration comes from a months-old conversation with Tam, as inspiration normally does. Feel free to say hi on Tumblr or [Twitter!](http://twitter.com/ezrabridgers)


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